#lance is just a bum

[tsuumies]

idk why but lance reminds me of the surf’s up audio that’s been going viral recently… like

[swaggerblonde]

Swagger Blonde Let's Plays Grand Theft Auto Vice City Stories PS2 Part 8...

[skitskatdacat63]

Catie I cant...I can't anymore I'm in my strollonso feels this morning i cant I need them. I miss em so much. They better make out in Zandvoort 🥺🥺🥺

(Also everyone thank nando for his service 😁😁)

Don't worry, we've survived through the worst of the drought, Elle (hopefully)🤧🤧 its been a long summer break.....Aston please you better have fixed your car.....

But god seriously. Fernando reposting that pic reawakened my need for strollonso content 🥺 please Aston feed us more 🥺 I literally had to go and reread fics, for the 100th time, of them bcs it made me so insane again. As I said in my tags, if Fernando is literally specifically reposting an old pic of them on his story, hopefully that means we'll be getting more content of them 🙏🙏🙏

[themultifanshipper]

Monaco. A truly magical place where anything can happen. Including potentially ruining your friendship with Max. With a plot twist.

The prequel to this fic.

Warnings: exhibitionism(technically), smut, choking, PinV sex, drugs and alcohol

"Max Verstappen wins the 2021 Monaco Grand Prix!"

You were pretty sure you were crying. Your best friend Max had just won the Monaco grand prix for the first time. A huge achievement in the world of F1. He lifted the trophy high above his head as you cheered from below. The whole Redbull garage was in chaos, everyone singing and cheering for Max. He winked at you before spraying champagne all over the podium, crowd, Lando and Carlos, all laughing and cheering at each other.

You couldn't help but feel sorry for Charles though, a DNF at your home race is always a hard pill to swallow. Hopefully he wasn't so bummed out that he wouldn't come out and party with you and Max, after all they had patched up their relationship since 2019 and he should be happy for his friend's win.

You, Charles and Max were close, often hanging out whenever you were staying with Max in Monaco. Usually ending up at parties until ungodly hours, you all finding company and going your seperate ways for the night, then meeting up the next day at a café, hungover and full of juicy gossip.

However this particular party felt a bit off for some reason. You'd managed to convince Charles to go out to a club instead of moping alone in his apartment. But there was a vibe. You weren't sure quite what the vibe was yet, but it was definitely there.

He was having more shots than usual, even after bad races. He was also hanging more around you instead of going to find girls to grind on and take back to his ridiculously giant bed. Not that you were complaining about it, you always welcomed Charles' company. But his arm found itself around you a little bit more often than usual. And you swore you saw him staring at your lips a bit too much for a public setting.

At one point Max found you and informed you he'd recieved a text from George, inviting you all to join him and a few other drivers at a yacht party. So you, Charles and Max went stumbling around the harbour trying to find this party.

Well, it wasn't exaclty hard.

It was the biggest yacht you'd ever seen, and in Monaco that was quite an achievement. It was more like a small cruise liner with so many people on it you were almost wondering if yachts could have a weight limit. It must have been some mega rich guy here just for the grand prix or something.

Before you could dwell on it too much however you heard a screech from above you up on the second deck.

"AYOOOO MAX! UP HERE MAN! AND YOU BROUGHT CHARLES WOOOOO! "

The three of you stared at Lando where he was hanging halfway over the railing, shirt way too open for decency, sunglasses almost slipping off his nose, and waving his glass around, getting himself quite wet. Nothing out of the ordinary, really.

Once you got onto the boat it was surprisingly easy to find the small group of drivers consisting of George, Alex, Lando, his friend Max, Lance, who was obviously selling something around the place, Carlos, who had obviously taken whatever Lance was selling, and Checo in a corner feeling up a girl who was definitely not his wife.

Anyway, you quickly lost both Max and Charles as you all mingled around and made acquaintances. But after a a few hours, a few drinks, and a few of whatever the fuck Lance had sold to seemingly half the boat, you got a bit lonely and set off to find people you knew.

The first person you came across was Lando, who had also taken something if the way he was incapable of focusing on your eyes as you spoke to him was any indication. He informed you that Charles had been looking for you, before going to look for some peace and quiet in the upper decks,

You got him a glass of water as thanks before going off to find Charles. It took you fucking forever. The place was huge, and you even bumped into Fernando during your quest, who greeted you with a big sloppy kiss on the cheek before sauntering off. Wow.

You found Charles sitting in one of the many upstairs rooms that sort of overlooked the deck below, where most of the crowd was, visible through massive windows.

By the time you'd finished ogling the layout you looked at Charles and found he was already staring intently at you.

"I know that look, Charles" You scolded him.

"I know you do. That's why I'm doing it" He grinned.

"Are you really that bored?"

"It is not about being bored. I want you"

You rolled your eyes. He always knew how to pick his moments, and he knew you could never resist him.

"But also..." he continued slowly, grabbing your hips and pulling you towrds him; his face changing into something more vulnerable "I want to have something Max does not"

Oh . This was a new development. Charles was jealous??

For a while now you and Charles had been fooling around. Max knew about it of course, you weren't exactly discreet, and you'd stopped counting the amount of times Charles had mentionned it off-hand in front of him. It usually happened when neither of you could find someone to take home and needed some good sex. And by god the sex was good. But that's not the point. The point was that you didn't really want this to happen on a random yacht, where anyone could see you if they looked hard enough up at the windows.

Add to that the fact you were pretty off your faces, and were possibly abandoning Max at this giant party, and it was shaping up to be the worst idea you'd ever heard.

"Because I thought this would finally be the year I would win at my home race."

"So I'm a replacement trophy?" You teased.

"Of course not" He grinned up at you "I want to give you all the pleasure that Max took away from me..."

So, you ended up on top of Charles on the bed, facing the door, riding him like your life depended on it. At some point, his hand had made it's way around your throat and was squeezing as your eyes rolled back and your rhythm faltered and your legs began to shake. He took it upon himself to grab your hip with his other hand and start slamming into you from below. You moaned loudly, not caring about all the noise you were both making as the music downstairs pounded through the walls. After all the times the two of you had done this, he knew your body like the back of his hand, expertly fucking you speechless with minimal effort.

Then, you realised with a start you hadn't locked the door when a shadow appeared under the crack and the handle turned, door swinging open.

Of course it had to be Max. Life would be two easy otherwise.

As your eyes met, his widened and you gasped, pussy tightening briefly around Charles, who took it as a sign of you being close. Embarrasingly, the idea of Max seeing you like this turned you on so much you almost came on the spot. His eyes staring you up and down, at the way your tits bounced as Charles rammed into you, at the way Charles's cock was splitting you open, and at the way you were drooling all over yourself and down Charles' wrist, your own eyes fixated on Max's.

He looked more turned on than anyone you'd ever seen. You were probably quite the sight, being dragged up and down Charles' cock like ragdoll. The thought made you clench again, so Charles groaned and tightened his hold on your throat, hips never faltering.

"Fuck- so tight. My god- rub your pretty little cunt for me and come on my cock, baby"

Max's jaw dropped as you did what you were told and started circling your clit fast and hard. He'd never seen you take orders from anyone, much less Charles. And he'd never expected Charles to talk like that, especially to you.

"Good Girl, fuck! Come on my cock." He slammed into you a few more times "That's my good girl..."

You moaned loud and you came hard around Charles, not able to keep your eyes open any longer as you rode out the waves of pleasure as he spilled deep inside you.

When your vision returned, Max was long gone, and Charles looked pretty blissed out, not realising what had just happened.

Tomorrow's debrief over coffee was going to be awkward...

[notallrobots]

@cloudy-osc HI i think your ask about fancyphone disappeared into a void but i wanted to answer it ^_^

i shouldn’t be surprised to find myself drawn to this ship… i’ve wanted to incorporate it into my au for awhile!!! i really like these two confident girls together (in harmony or argument; you must know by now that the ships that i like aren’t usually pure fluff eheh).

disgust, despite her practical application and razor-sharp eye for social politics, is actually a very romantic person (judging by her interest in that guy lance slashblade or flashblade i forget. he’s only important because he aids in disgust’s characterization). even though she can be haughty and stuck-up, she is still the kind of girl to daydream, drawn to the tall and handsome, (sorry fear. you’re handsome but you aren’t all that tall…) and also to complex heroism.

i think that disgust would ascribe that same kind of romanticization to ennui’s laziness - disgust might view ennui as some sort of pure, languorous beauty, her apathy a manifestation of poetic (and thus attractive) unhappiness.

this is not realistic, my darling disgust. ennui in actuality is just a bum, and she is happy to be one (although she is at least standing up a little straighter towards the end of io2). ennui answers questions as briskly and brusquely as possible. ennui takes naps in the middle of work. ennui unabashedly criticizes riley’s uncool friends (and she certainly has the right… ENNUI IS THE ONLY “COOL” CHARACTER IN THE IO FRANCHISE. Everyone else has some form of neuroticism. EHEH). ennui doesn’t brush her hair all that regularly, but it’s still long, silky, and flowing around her shoulders and sweater. ennui the only bilingual in the cast. She’s a part of two worlds. Beautiful. Ennui, i self insert as every character in inside out just to get closer to you.

omg this turned into ennui love poem… uhm.

i don’t view this ship as exactly one-sided, but the romantic endeavor is certainly disgust’s to begin with. only time will tell when it comes to this yuri success…… o_o i have faith. don’t forget that french is the language of love after all :3 And disgust wants to love!! 🩷🩷

take this crummy doodle on the magma for now…

i’m so fancyphone you already know i’m in the fast lane

[studentinpursuitofclouds]

lately I've been messing with a mod that changes some vanilla + sve dialogues about the species of the farmer to make them recognise them as not human (you can kinda customize the race). It's been pretty fun and great for role-playing but at the same time, it kinda crossed my mind that a supernatural lineage/genetics could sort of justify the weird thing of the farmer's children growing at strange paces for a human child (going from baby to toddler in weeks and then stoping) if they're biological.

And like, probably for the farmer it's the most normal thing in the world and never mentioned such details about children in their species. And so. It happens. The kid grows too fast or too slow. Maybe it's because the farmer is from a species that lives longer than usual so it halts the development even if they're half-human, or are from species that just reaches maturity faster than humans. Or whatever.

So, what kind of reactions do you think some bachelors/bachelorettes would have upon discovering their children have messed up stages of growth bc of this? I'm not thinking about anyone in particular but I kind of think that the more adventure/magic related spouses would get it easier or even expect it. Whoever you think would be more interesting, really.

I hope I wasn't too vague or weird with this idea-- Have a great day and weekend 🫶🪻

That's a pretty interesting theory about children growing up quickly! Usually a lot of people (myself included) have discussed the rapid passing of the seasons in Stardew Valley, but it's usually written off to the mechanics of the game or the fact that this magical world doesn't have the same passage of time as normal. After all, carrots don't grow for only three days, and autumn doesn't consist of only one month. Heh, I like this idea, dear anon, thanks for your ask! 💕

You mentioned that you weren't thinking of anyone in particular, but I understood that adventure/magic meant Expanded mod, right? So I'll include some candidates from vanilla game and mod. Anyway, enjoy!

_____________________________

Abigail:

Abigail thought at first that she was sleep-deprived (being a parent was a challenge, after all), but even as she wiped her eyes and scrutinized the baby's crib, the purple-haired girl was stunned. It's her baby, but at the same time, it's not??? What the heck is going on?

"Farmer, can I talk to you for a moment?"

She knew both for Farmer's background and the fact that their child might inherit some of her spouse's abilities of their non-human half, the young mom was prepared. But here was the rapidly passing stage from baby to toddler that was unexpected for both of them. Well, at least Farmer had explained that only this stage would be skipped like this. On one hand, Abby was a little bummed that she hadn't gotten to babysit her son/daughter as baby more, but on the other hand she exhaled a sigh of relief that now she wouldn't have to deal with the constant dirty diapers and crying in the middle of the night almost every two hours.

Magnus Rasmodius:

The creatures from which Farmer had roots were known for their longevity and slower growth stages, unlike the human race. Magnus knows this very well, he even has a book about it somewhere in his library. The wizard knows the entire contents by heart, as he wanted to understand what to be prepared for when a new member of his and Farmer's family arrives. This point, however, caused him a share of sadness.

Rasmodius loves Farmer and their beautiful child dearly, and wouldn't trade that happiness for anything. It's just... his child (and Farmer too) will live longer than Magnus himself, and he's already old. He's afraid he'll leave this world before his son/daughter starts talking or even recognize him... But at least the magical crystals he charges with memories and photos of a happy family will remind his child that they had a father, and that Magnus loved them and Farmer very much.

Lance:

It was rare to find Lance dumbfounded, especially dumbfounded by his own child. The gallant adventurer and young father wasn't the least bit surprised that his and Farmer's newborn was showing magic already at a young age, given the pedigree of both parents. But what kind of magic had made his crawling baby into an already confidently walking toddler?

"My soul, do you recall any other unusual features on your part that might explain this transformation?" Yep, Farmer could answer that.

It's a similar situation with Magnus, Lance will have a pang of sadness that he will grow old faster than his dearest spouse and his child. But that's fate, and there's no point in wasting this time with sad thoughts. Lance will devote all his time to his family, loving and protecting them as long as he walks this earth.

Emily:

It's one thing when the sudden growing up of an unusual child happens, say, somewhere over the course of a few days to a week, where you slowly but surely ask yourself the logical question, but are at least somehow prepared for it. And it's other thing - when you walk out of the nursery, with your newborn's dirty pyjamas, and come back in a couple of minutes later and they're already a toddler. That's how Emily caught the miraculous transformation of her kid.

At first, the gem lover thought that her child was cursed by someone, and began to look for ways to remove this misfortune and cleanse the house of the dark aura. Until her spouse Farmer came home and explained to Emily what had just happened. Why didn't they tell her sooner? Well, their great-great-great-great-great-great grandmother wasn't exactly human (Farmer too, but partly), and there was a 1 in 1000 chance of someone in the family will "skip" one of the stages of growing up. But that's just this stage, from here on out it's all human. Shocking, but baby and Farmer are fine, that's the main thing. Oh, their baby needs a new clothes! To the sewing machine! ☝️

[daddymothxxx]

For Basimah

Some things happen so fast.

He came out with his blue, raspberry flavored, slushy and box of loaded fries from a some hole in the wall hotdog joint with a logo that reminded him of a clown. Pep in his step.

Paying not a single bit of mind to the distant screech of tires down the block as he found a bench to sit at. Kicking loose a bum Sinner sleeping on it under a few sheafs of newspaper. Off you go. And off they went.

Dusted his spot off with a hand and had a seat. Popping box open with one set of hands and getting gold caps off with another, shortly pocketed. The roar of racing engines was getting closer, but he was busy eating his fries and indulging himself a few happy, quiet, squeaks about it. Though food down here didn't taste like more than a memory of the living world's version, it did still hit all the good brain spots like scratching under a dog's chin.

And drag racing wasn't at all illegal or uncommon.

Had no reason to think otherwise.

Didn't until well after the pain bloomed in his torso and the screaming started. Barely heard the gunshots that proceeded. Automatic gunfire that made Swiss cheese of the bricks and windows behind him--and likely his chest.

Though he didn't exactly have a starkly defined account of the number of holes there. He suspected many more than were good for him.

His vision was tunneling even as he found himself slumped on bench with his head tipped back. Red sky appearing, to him, to be a shade of murky burgundy--too dark and too gray. His first gasp since it happened made fireworks pop off in his vision. (Somewhere he heard breaks.)

A bleated and still functional part of his thoughts not currently overwhelmed by pain wondered if he'd been the target or just collateral. Either option seemed plausible. Drive-bys? They aren't particularly accurate. Only devastating and swift.

He got his answer when a hand yanked him by the open collar of his shit shirt. Some skunk looking Sinner that smirked into his face while driving a shard of some long broken blade into his side. Some tight space between his upper and lower arms. Kidneys? He didn't know what was where in his fucked up anatomy.

Once. Twice. Three times.

Angel steel by the way it had him whiting out each time it lanced into his flesh. Pulling a choked sound each time. There was already blood in his lungs from the mundane bullets that'd gotten in them.

"For Basimah." The Sinner told him, pat his face, and shoved him over to the side onto the bench. Sprinting off back to waiting car that immediately peeled away. Not dumb enough to stick around or dally.

Everyone knew Vox had eyes on Valentino and there was only a slight window of time to exploit in the Overlord's awareness. The job was done.

[alluraaaa]

transgender voltron thoughts. separated by character. voltrans thoughts

this got long so the rest is under the cut

shiro

trans man. he/him. realized it as a tween. like 11

already had the “shiro” nickname from his surname but chose takashi because it’s the name his mom planned to use. his momma was his best friend growing up so takashi is a special secret name only certain people can casually use for him <3

has a model minority complex and thinks he has to be a perfect person and a perfect role model and perfect everything else. he doesn’t think everyone needs to be like this but he does you don’t get it he needs to be perfect in order to gain basic respect

(he has anxiety) (went thru a frat boy phase tho where he let loose a little)

he’s a bear. when he started t and gained weight and started growing thicker body hair he was like “FUCK YEAH”

wanted top and bottom surgery. irl modern phalloplasty can take skin grafts from the arm and for sillies shiro did that. but on the arm he lost. can’t even show off his cool graft scar 🙄 stupid galra

him and adam are t4t. he picked the name adam because his deadname is eve and he’s the funniest ever

keith

trans man. he/him. realized at like 6

randomly walked up to his dad and said “pops i wanna be a boy” and his dad went “okay son :^)” and helped him with picking a new name and pronouns. that’s why he ended up with keith of all names

his dad planned on helping him with puberty blockers and hrt because keith said he wanted it but. he died before keith got to that age :^(

so unfortunately keith had to go thru one puberty and then another. and THEN he gets a weird galra puberty in his 20s. puberties gerog

shiro was the one to help him get access to testosterone and top surgery <3 yay trans brotherhood ^_^

keith doesn’t care about his junk enough to get bottom surgery tho. he really only got top surgery to get cool ass scars on his chest. he doesn’t give a shit about gender essentialism and isn’t afraid to stab a transphobe ❤️

pidge

trans girl. she/her. also realized when she was real young

same as keith she was just one day like “i wanna be a girl” and her parents were the same and immediately accepted her and helped her with transitioning (she had a bit more social transitioning tho because she wasn’t in the middle of bum fuck nowhere)

unlike keith tho she got to do puberty blockers and start e as a tween and stuff. good for her!

she picked the name katie but it’s not short for anything. she gets the question all the time and she always rolls her eyes

detransitioning for the garrison sucked like ass and she hated it but she did it for her family. coming out to the team was a huge weight off her shoulders

she has a love/hate relationship with femininity but i already went through all that in another post so i’m linking it here. smiles 😁

lance

bigender man/woman. she/he. realizes it while with team voltron

THEE most obvious egg ever. also very obvious bisexual but hasn’t realized that either. it’s painful to watch sometimes (send help to hunk because you know he immediately clocked lance)

he likes women so much because he’s straight!!!! and a lady’s man!!!!!!!!! he doesn’t wanna be a girl and even if he did that’s a universal unspoken secret that all boys have but agree to never talk about!!!!!!!!!!!!

once pidge comes out the rest of the team have more casual talks about being trans and lance is so tbh creature at them. hunk definitely gossips about how clear the closet is behind lance’s back #messy

lance never realizes on her own what happens is keith tells her despite hunk saying that that’s rude. he blatantly tells lance that she obviously wants to be a girl and that she can do that if she wants to. and when she says she likes being a guy keith says she can be both if she wants. she can do whatever she wants forever

after that she thinks about it for like a day and then is like “yayyyyy i’m a boy and a girl and i like boys and girls ^_^”

she has soooo much fun with femininity she plays dress up and is so pretty ❤️ she is indeed a lady’s man but also very clearly wanted to be beautiful like ladies are. and she is ladies!! yayyyyy

didn’t change her name because she loves being leandro alvarez-núñez-cuesta-espinosa so so much ❤️❤️

hunk

agender. any pronouns. realized as a teen

just fully doesn’t care about gender. obviously will respect people’s genders but like. gender as a concept is irrelevant to him and he opted out of gender. he’s too autistic for it tbh

use whatever pronouns you want. make up funny pronouns. fuck it we ball

“this is hunk bong’s my best friend i love bong so much” “lance oh my god”

hunk is a childhood nickname and only family (and lance) know his birthname. didn’t care enough to change it when coming out. he likes his name!! why change it!!

he’s a genius mechanic with access to super advanced alien technology so for funsies he invents a machine that can do instant top and/or bottom surgery with no problem. he can mess around with it for funsies or fashion or whatever. and ofc the team has free access to it as well <3 the only one to use it often tho is lance #besties

allura

trans girl. she/her. realized not long before the events of the show

the post about trans allura that inspired this whole post here

was able to use her shapeshifting powers to her transvantage (trans advantage)

her being out for not long before the war is why she was so excited that pidge is a girl. she’s a girl making friends with other girls!!!!!! and that excitement doubles when learning that pidge is earth’s equivalent of trans yayyyyy

in my mind the notion of people fitting into gender roles on altea is the same vibe as the notion of women wearing skirts not pants irl. like that’s an outdated idea but not that outdated unfortunately :^/

i don’t think there was major misogyny or transphobia on altea tho. not sure if it makes sense to anyone else but it makes sense in my mind ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

coran

nonbinary. any pronouns

when allura came out she sat down with her parents and coran (honorary third parent) and talked about her feelings and thoughts on gender as a whole. coran went “oh. is that not how cis people think?”

he’s not a man or a woman but he’s not sure what he is exactly. he’s coran!

he’d make homemade hrt. may or may not have weird side effects

[nostalgicish]

thinking abt fic ideas as someone who can’t write is painful…. like. i’m obsessed w modern aus rn

(i have a few mutuals that write so if you guys wanna……….. 👀 take inspiration from this…… 👀 tag me so i can read it !!)

Lance and Hunk work at a library and like to people watch, guessing what genres they like to read. a grunge/punk guy with the worst RBF walks in and they’re really surprised to see he’s checking out classic romance literature.

idk something with public transportation? like they take the same train/bus/subway every day but they never actually talk— just eyes that meet occasionally and a polite smile but nothing more. until one day, the other guy just.. stops showing up? and Lance is pretty bummed but what can he do? (and then he sees a familiar mop of black hair at the grocery store or a café or something and is like “!! it’s you!!”)

The trio go out to see the next installment of their favorite movie series, but Lance keeps sneaking out of the theater to buy more snacks (and definitely not to talk to the hot guy running the concession stand)

Keith works at a convenience store/gas station and this tall, beautiful man comes in occasionally, but no matter what he buys, he always always always gets a bag of candy that just so happens to be Keith’s favorite too— he always has a bag at his station so he can snack on it throughout his shift. One day, the man is in line without the candy and he honestly looks like shit— he’s definitely not his usual, happy self. Keith asks about the candy. The man replies, “Oh, i couldn’t find any today... You guys must be out.” So Keith gives him a bag from his stash. “You look like you need it more than me.”

Lance goes to the campus library to check out books for his literature class, but every single time, without fail, someone else has taken the last copy. “What do you mean someone else checked out the last copy?? Who??” “That guy.” *insert Keith* (it would be funnier if Keith isn’t even reading them for class, he’s just reading classic literature for funsies)

Lance checks out a novel from the library and there’s an envelope inside with a name written neatly on the front of it. it looks like it’s important so he resolves to find and return the envelope to K. Kogane, whoever that is (another library one?? yeah sorry idc i love public libraries and books and love stories . sue me.)

Keith is a barber/hairdresser and Lance’s regular stylist isn’t available so he’s stuck with Keith -OR- Lance takes his nephew to get his hair cut and Keith looks kinda scary but he’s actually?? really good with kids?? (insert mullet joke here)

Keith meets Pidge’s friends from a different class. Keith is super into Pidge’s hot, tall friend but is discouraged from acting on it because he’s constantly glued to Hunk’s side and making comments like “this is why I love you, Hunky” and (wrongfully) assumes they’re dating (but Lance is just that kind of guy! yk! he says “ily” to his friends all the time!)

bartender Keith is so good but think abt bartender Lance……… yeah….. need i say more??

[brattyprettysub2]

Stupid Little Bun

All characters in this piece of fiction are role-playing adults.

*

Bunbun is sleeping when Lance gets home. That's not unusual. She often uses naps to fill her day, even though he always leaves her with a lovely collection of toys. There are squeaky toys and jingly bells dangling from a plastic frame for her to bat at; she has her aerial swing for her silly kitty games, though she's only allowed to use that if she has a plug in her bottom and Lance didn't give her one this morning. There are several thick dildos attached with suction cups to various surfaces around the house -- to the floors and mirrors, mostly, though there is one on the wall of the shower. It's her favourite dildo, so she has to have the water running when she uses that one. She's not allowed to open the tap entirely; an empty-headed little bunny like her would end up wasting too much water. She has to open it so that there's just an annoying little trickle of cold water dripping onto her twitchy bunny nose as she rides her favourite toy.

He isn't sure how often she actually uses that one. He only finds the water still running when he comes home about once a week, but maybe the stupid little pup remembers to turn it off on other occasions. He's having cameras installed this weekend, so he'll have a better idea of how his pet spends her days when he's at work. They'll connect to an app on his phone and if he pays extra, he can stream the videos to subscribers. Bunbun might end up with quite a few fans.

Little Bunbun's tuckered out today. Usually she wakes up when she hears the front door opening, but she's still asleep even after he has taken off his shoes and hung up his coat. He walks over to where she's sleeping on her plush dog bed and crouches down beside her. "Bunbun," he coos in a sing-song voice. "Kitty, Master's home."

She jolts awake, blinking and confused and her tongue already lolling out in puppyish excitement. There's a patch of drool on her bed; she really is such a messy little thing. She squeaks excitedly, knowing better by now to try and use people words -- that training only took about three weeks of her getting a clothes peg on her tongue every time she tried to speak rather than making noises like a good pet.

"Hey, Bunbun," he says, laughing when she immediately shoves her face into his crotch. That had been an easy trick to teach; she'd just received a reward every time she'd greeted him in the way a pretty, brainless pet should, and even though she doesn't need the training any more, a bit of reinforcement doesn't hurt. He rubs a hand down her back, trailing down her spine all the way down to her bum, and slides a finger between her cheeks. He rubs the pad of his finger against her hole. She used to flinch at the touch of a dry finger, scared that he'd try to push it inside her, but now, she arches her back and presses back against it.

"Slutty puppy," he says fondly, then pulls back and pushes the same finger that was pressed against her hole into her mouth, pressing down hard on her tongue and making her drool even more. She goes a little cross-eyed and he laughs.

She was confused at first, when he kept calling her puppy and kitty and bunny, sometimes using two or more in the same sentence. Every time she tried to ask, though, she ended up with a clothes peg on her tongue. Finally, one evening, she sat at his feet and pawed at his knee and made squeaky, questioning noises, cocking her head like a curious puppy.

"Okay," he said, stroking her hair. It was growing back from when he'd shaved it and was adorably tufty, making her look like a fluffy duckling -- maybe a new pet to add to the list. "One question," he said.

"Master, why --" She blinked several times, frowning. He hoped that one day, it would have been long enough that she would forget how to put sentences together entirely. "Master, why puppy an' kitty an' bun?"

He cupped her face in his hands and booped her bunny nose. Truthfully, he liked the lack of a solid identity for her; he liked that she didn't have a single animal to latch onto and model herself on; he liked that she wasn't finding it easy. Sometimes he'd given her a command and he could see her hesitating, trying to work out if he wanted her to respond like a bunny or a puppy or a kitty. He liked the confusion, liked the fear. But he couldn't say that to her; her silly little pet brain just wouldn't understand.

"Because you are a puppy and a kitty and a bunny!" he said, smiling widely so she'd know this was a good thing. His voice was overly cheery and he could practically see a part of her mind fighting against it, wanting to call him a patronising bastard as she had so often at the start, but the rest of her was so happy that Master was happy! A little bit of drool spilled down her chin and he wiped it away with his thumb. "You're playful like a kitty and you're humpy like a puppy and you're so stupid, aren't you, just like a bunny?" She stared at him with wide eyes and he held her face a little harder, digging his fingers into the hinge of her jaw. "Aren't you?"

"Yes!" she squeaked, and he pressed a finger to her lips.

"No more people words for you today," he said. "Stupid little bun, Master said you could have one question. Can't even count, can you?"

Slowly, she shook her head. She still looked a bit uncertain, though, so he pulled out his cock and fed it into her mouth until she was trilling happily around it, her head filled with nothing but thoughts of cock, cock, cock.

Now, he pets her and tells her she's just a stupid kitty, yes she is, yes she is! She coos and meows, and when he slides two fingers over her pussy, he finds it drippy and messy with slick. "Always thinking with your cunt, aren't you, Bunbun?" he says. He sighs like he's so hard done by. "Okay, you can ride Master before I take you for walkies."

He spoils her, he knows that he does. But when she squeals and nuzzles and pushes him down onto the rug so she can hop onto his lap and immediately start bouncing on him, absolutely no comprehension that his cock is tucked away behind his pants and can't go into her, he can't bring himself to regret it.

*

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[maxybabyy]

Daniel is three weeks into the programme when Scotty asks to join him.

“What do you say then? Should we go for a run like we used to?” He says and nudges Daniel’s shoe with a naked toe. “Get some of those muscles back on you, eh?”

Daniel laughs, hooks his foot around his ankle. He pulls him into his lap, rests his weight on his good leg. “Don’t think I can keep up with you anymore, Scotty. You, me, and my bum knee. Don’t think we’re getting very far, yeah?”

Scotty smiles, rubs a thumb over the LED bracelet he slapped on in case the sun sets before he comes home. It’s better than the yellow vest his mother had told him to wear, but it still makes him feel ridiculous. Scotty, he knows, prefers to run on trails, in the deep woods with nothing but trees and birds to keep you company.

But Daniel cannot do that now.

The forest floor is too uneven for him, filled with broken-off branches and stones the size of his fist. He can barely run a mile on a flat surface, doesn’t want to challenge himself with a broken ankle as well. So he runs by the roads now, always in the vicinity of help if he were to fall.

“Hey, Lance and the fam are coming into town in two weeks or so,” Scotty says and pulls out his phone. He flips the screen around to show him a scenic view of one of the trails they used to take before the crash. A viewpoint over the water, secluded enough that Daniel had gone to his knees without problems, sucked him off until they were both fucked out and satisfied on their way down.

“I don’t know your schedule, never know where you are these days, Ric,” he says, laughs. It feels weird in his chest, bitter to taste, but Daniel laughs with him, doesn’t say the answer nowadays is mostly PT. “But it would be cool if you could come, yeah? Been a while since we’ve done something like this.”

Daniel smiles, tightens the hand resting on Scotty’s hip.

Scotty wasn’t around when Daniel crashed, deep in his training programme for the next circuit of games. Blake had offered to call him, to arrange his flights so he could come and see him before his surgery. But Daniel hadn’t wanted Scotty to see him like that, injured and pathetic, overcome with pain at any movement of his leg.

He had been on crutches by the time Scotty came home, moving by himself and mostly off the hard meds. “Come to play nurse, haven’t I?” Scotty said and clumsily carried him to bed. But even then was a shit time for Daniel, no position suitable for both sex and his knee.

Times like these are when he regrets not involving Scotty more in his recovery. The evasive memory of his crash and subsequent injury, the current limitations he was working with.

“Don’t really think I can, babe,” Daniel says and tips him to the side, Scotty landing on the couch with a bump. He leans down to tighten his shoes, stands up for a quick stretch. “Unless you wanna carry me down?”

Scotty hums, stares at his knee, at the scar making its way down his leg. He looks, puzzled, and Daniel doesn’t know how to feel.

“Yeah, no dice, mate,” he says faintly.

Daniel shrugs, tries to breathe out the bitter frustration. He leans down for a kiss, just a brush of their lips before he’s upright again. “Right, I’ll be off. Dinner later? I will order something.”

He’s barely out of the door before his phone is in his hand, music in his ears as he presses start on the next run in his programme.

“Another day, another lovely run with you. I am coach Max, the Red Bull Running global head coach, and I will be with you every step of this two-mile run,” Max says in his ears, the familiar accent easing him into a different mindset as he lets the built-up frustration bleed away.

“You did not want to be here maybe. Perhaps the weather is bad where you run, and you feel tired today also. But you pressed start, so for the next 1.6 kilometres, I will of course help you to become the best runner you can today, and I think that is the most important thing right now.”

Daniel breathes out, shifts the pressure onto his bad knee, and when it feels good, he picks up the pace, loses himself in Max’s voice, “I’m here, Maxy. Tell me what to do.”

[antiquepearlss]

just like genuinely, what do u think the tts cast does on halloween? as in like whos chilling at home watching movies(and maybe giving out candy to trick-or-treaters), whos throwing a party?, whos attending said party, who ARE the trick-or-treaters?

i dont really have any opinions but i do think raps throws a party, but its outside so anyone can join, i think varian usually attends but sometimes he js stays home and chills(but he dresses up for the vibes), and the girl obviously go trick-or-treating and lance takes them:3(they meet up at rapunzels after a long night and they trade candy and have a big sleepover to celebrate halloween)

I’m loving the Halloween/fall asks ty

I think Raps throws a Halloween party every year, and it’s always really big. And yes, it’s outside so anyone can join! Eugene also gets in on the fun and helps. They do matching couples costumes. If they’re not partying, the two love giving candy out to trick or treaters, and to people who work on Halloween. Then they spend the night in matching pajamas and watch various non-scary Halloween movies and eat enough candy to put themselves into a coma.

Lance and the girls are happy to join the party, Cass has enough fun but would rather be at home, (and she rarely dresses up, she puts on a t shirt and is like “this is my costume”) and Varian kinda hates parties, but he enjoys being with his friends and not feeling like a loser for spending Halloween alone. (Ha now Hugo can’t make fun of him.) I think they go ab 50% of the time, if Lance and the girls are done trick or treating, and Varian and Cass feel like socializing.

Literally none of them have trick or treated so Lance makes sure to give Kiera and Catalina that experience. He and Rapunzel put so much effort into their costumes and he gives them tips on amplifying their cuteness for more candy. Even when the girls get older, he’s still insistent on them having fun. I don’t think Varian trick or treated past age seven tbh, it just doesn’t seem like something Quirin would be all that into. He was really bummed at the time, but is too “grown up” to go as a teenager. Cass thinks it’s weird. (killjoy)

I think Varian and Cassandra mostly spend Halloweens just watching scary movies and eating candy tbh. Sometimes they do it together. I think Cass enjoys slasher films and idk what horror he would like tbh, he seems like someone who is both easily freaked out and also super nitpicky when it comes to movies lmao. I think he just watches Over The Garden Wall or True Crime YouTube or whatever Cass decides to put on. I think he, Cass, the girls, and Eugene enjoy really bad horror movies and making fun of them together. (They all love Velocipastor)

[the-offside-rule]

Lance Stroll (Aston Martin) - Stay Away Part 4

Part 1

Part 2

Part 3

Lance sat in the race briefing, thinking about Y/n and George. They looked quite happy and it bothered Lance a bit. He couldn't focus at all, all this over Lando's sister. He couldn't comprehend how the two could be related. One was so nice to him, the other barely spoke to him. These thoughts continued up until the start of the race. Lance stood preparing, still understanding what was happening. "Hey Lance." Lance groaned and continued putting on his helmet as he heard th e annoying British voice. As Lando approached, he knew Lance wasn't going to talk so why not provoke him? "What's the matter?" Lando asked, knowing fully well what was happening. "Can you just leave me please? I have to get ready for the race." Lando laughed and got a bit closer to Lance. "I see you came to your senses that you weren't good enough for her then." Lance looked between his Aston Martin and Lando's McLaren right behind. "As if, look who's qualified ahead." Lando grumbled in response. He didn't like seeing Lance's racing green Aston Martin right ahead of his papaya orange McLaren. "Won't last long, don't get points for qualifying." Lando smirked. "With the mood I'm in you'll be lucky if you even get points." Lando clenched his jaw tight and walked off, prepared himself. He was going to out race Lance, no matter what it took.

"Fuck!" Lance screamed as he turned his radio off. He swore and hit the steering wheel before he removed it and hopped out. He was doing well up until turn 1,he managed to gain two positions but then a Mercedes hit him from behind. He didn't speak in the medical car and he barely spoke in the medical centre as they ran their mandatory checks. His head was checked as well as the rest of his body but main priority was his head and neck. He was cleared and so he stood up and walked out the door to the medical centre. He looked in front of him to see the familiar face of Y/n sitting right outside. "Oh thank god you're okay." Y/n said as she took notice of the door opening.

"What are you doing here?" Lance asked as Y/n stood up. "Making sure you were okay. Lando isn't here to stop me now so I can do what I want really." She pulled him into a hug, before he slowly wrapped his arms around her to return the hug. Lance's lips curled into a light-hearted smile before the pair walked off together. "It's nice outside, isn't it?" Y/n asked. Lance looked up at the sky and saw that there were no clouds at all. "Yeah, looks nice." He replied. She looked over at Lance and knew he was still bummed out about being crashed out in turn 1,which is completely understandable. She just wanted to get his mind off it for a bit. They were silent for a while, Lance spoke up first.

"You aren't going to ask about what happened?" Y/n shook her head. "Nope. One thing you don't ask a driver is about their race if they dnf. Lando told me that." So Lando can be right sometimes Lance thought. "He's right to be honest. No one likes being asked about bad things." She continued to walk with him as they walked out into the paddock, the sky sports cameras following them both. Lance tended to his media duties while Y/n sat watching Lando racing.

Lance stood at the McLaren hospitality, wondering whether ror not he should aks someone to go get Y/n but thankfully, she already saw him. "Finished now?" Lance nodded. "Let's go get some food or something then. Don't really want to stay here." Lance and Y/n spoke about anything and everything on the way to a small cafe just in the small town nearby the track. They sat down, yet again talking about anything and everything. Y/n's phone rang, Lanods name popping up. "Give me one second." She told Lance. "Yeah? What's up?" she asked Lando. "Why aren't you here?" Lando asked. "I'm not in the mood to get sprayed by champagne, Lando. I'm in tb e mood for a coffee." She said. "So you're not coming to my podium?" Lando asked through the phone. Y/n looked back to Lance and smiled. "No, too busy at the moment Lando."

"Too busy for your own brother?" he asked jokingly. "Yeah, too busy." Lando was quiet for a minute. He was thinking. "Who are you with?"

"Guess."

"Charlotte said she saw you walk out the paddock with Lance, it better not be true. I'll disown you."

"Disown me then. Y/n Stroll sounds better anyway." Y/n replied cheekily, driving Lando absolutely insane. "Don't you dare hang up! Get back for my podium!" He demanded. "Sorry Lando!" and with that, Y/n hung up and put her phone away. She looked over to Lance and saw him smirking at her. "What?" she asked. "Y/n Stroll does have a nice ring to it." Lance chuckled as he swirled the teaspoon around the cup of coffee. "Yeah well, I-"

"Not your name yet." Lance joked, sipping on his drink. "Yeah, yet. Still got some time to go until then, ey Lancelot?" Lance took her hand into his from across the table. "Lots of time. Can't wait to spend it with you."

"So, how are we feeling then?" Lance asked Y/n as they lay in bed together. "I like the name a lot." She giggled as Lance lifted her hand up and stretching her finngers out to show off her ring. "I like the name too. It suits you." Y/n smiled and cuddled into Lance. "Much better than Norris." Lance kissed her hair and agreed. "Y/n Stroll,

My wife."

[tangledbea]

I am rewatching the whole series, and I noticed that in Pascals story, he just turned up in the castle. Was it previously established that he was part of their group ?

He who? Lance? I assume you mean Lance.

The S1 episodes aired largely out of production order, and that's the most obvious through Lance's presence and interactions with everyone. Lance's canonical S1 order is:

The Return of Strongbow

Queen For a Day

Painter’s Block

Pascal’s Story

Big Brothers of Corona

Max’s Enemy

The Way of the Willow

The Secret of the Sundrop

So, what we have here is:

Lance shows up out of the blue and is introduced to Rapunzel and Cassandra. By the end of the episode, he’s on thin ice with both of them (though his confession to being behind the ring fiasco softens Rapunzel to him a little).

Lance is bumming around the castle, calling for kitchen raids and stealing Frederic’s clothes (boots and hat) when he’s not around/looking. Frederic doesn’t know his name.

Lance is now comfortable chilling in Rapunzel’s room with Eugene and Cassandra. He sits on the arm of a chair that Cassandra is presently sitting in, and she doesn’t seem to mind. He also attends the painting class with Rapunzel.

Lance is now comfortable roaming around the castle by himself, without supervision or being stopped by the guards. In fact, he’s comfortable enough that he found Pascal alone with a huge feast of a dinner, trapped Pascal, and ate it all himself. (Come to think of it, that plot is such Grimm’s Fairytales “people’s hero” bullshit. XD) At the end, Pascal makes him do the dishes.

Eugene is trying to get Lance a job with the guard. He helps with training the guards, then gets assigned to help reform Kiera and Catalina. Frederic is aware of this, and seems to at least not disapprove of it.

A bit part in this episode, he’s still trusted enough by the Captain to take a current criminal into custody.

Lance gives Arianna a birthday present and the nickname “Mrs. Queen.” (This is the first and only real interaction with Arianna he has in the series.) This means that he was either invited to her familial birthday celebration or he just heard about it from Eugene and Rapunzel and invited himself. But if the latter is the case, he was thoughtful enough to bring a present for her! (Even if he wasn’t thoughtful enough to not ask to borrow it back immediately afterward.) Frederic wants to go camping with Lance and Eugene as one of the guys. Lance feels comfortable inviting him, which means hanging out with him all night. Also, and this is important, Pascal now likes him enough to perch on his shoulder. (You can actually see a character’s acceptance in the group by whether or not Pascal is willing to sit on them.)

Lance is willing to join the fight against Varian to save Arianna.

So, as you can see, when they're in order, his presence there is already well-established by "Pascal's Story".

[bohnsky]

You guys. I might just be the happiest person alive right now. When I started getting into F1 a few months I decided for whatever reason (the reason being Charles Leclerc) to support Ferrari. I quickly learned that being a Ferrari fan came with lots of downs and very few highs, but today I learned that the highs can be so high that you want to die on the spot because there is no way life could get any better.

You can guess how I feel about Carlos winning today. In Monza I got a Chestappen podium, now I got a Carlando podium. What’s next? Strollonso? Sewis? (thinking about it, Seb’s going to be in Suzuka, maybe we’ll actually get Sewis content, not a podium tho)

Also I didn’t expect to see Eric Nam at F1. Never in my life would I have expected to watch Eric Nam shake Carlos Sainz’ hand. Like wtf?

And that last grill the grid episode killed me. As someone who is interested in geography I can say that some of their answeres were catastrophic. It was hard to watch at some points. (Like wtf do you mean you have to find Europe first?)

So here are my favorite drivers four months and a week into liking f1. This time I decided to do a top five because my top three haven’t changed in ages:

1. Alex Albon

I love him, his voice, his face, his goofy laugh, his personality, (his girlfriend ahem), his driving, his everything. Please marry me. The marketing short film with the Albon pets, I mean come on. Alex and cats is everything I need in my life. And the other drivers with his shoes, that’s so cute.

The weekend was not optimal for Williams, but tbh I didn’t really pay much attention to them because I was a little distracted by Ferrari and Red Bull.

2. Sergio Perez

Okay hear me out. I love Checo and I feel bad for what I’m about to say but I was so happy that Red Bull had a bad weekend. I like Max and I love Checo but it felt so good to see someone else win for a change. Although I would’ve loved to see Checo in front, because I always do.

3. Charles Leclerc

My little Ferrari heart was so happy this weekend. And I think that Charles should have pitted for mediums in the end there and maybe we would’ve gotten both Ferraris on the podium. Charles did some incredible defending and keeping the Mercs behind him to help Carlos. Afterwards he seemed a little bummed out, but happy enough for the team and Carlos.

Also he’s just the cutest on grill the grid, always looks so confused. And his laugh, I can’t with him.

4. Lewis Hamilton

This is probably no surprise to anyone, because I keep debating if I should put him or Charles on third and Charles always wins. Lewis is great and he deserves the podium. Although I do think that George should have gotten it.

Also I just found out that he has an Extreme X team. With Christina Gutierrez. How cool is that please? (Not as cool as Carlos Sr. with Laia Sanz my love my one and only, but still)

5. Carlos Sainz

So this is where it gets intresting, because I had Lando and Lance on my list for fifth as well, but lately I have become somewhat obsessed with Carlos. I’ve always liked him, but now I love him. He has become one of my favorite drivers (otherwise he wouldn’t be fifth lol). He is funny, smart, seems like a very nice guy and doesn’t take himself too seriously and I love that. I guess you can imagine how I went feral several times this weekend. The fact that he kept Lando close enough so he’d be in his DRS zone. I mean sure it was strategy, but still. I like to believe that he did it solely to help his Lando.

Honerable mentions:

Lando. Of course, what a great race and I can’t with all of this Carlando content. They deserve the world. But damn just let Lando stay home when you do geography with grill the grid. It hurts us all, not only him.

Lance. I really don’t know what it is about him. He took my heart. Every time I see him, I just want to squeeze him. I was super happy about all the Lance content we got from grill the grid, but then quail happened. I just hope he is okay and recovers quickly. That crash was insane, but luckily security got better over time.

Fernando. First it was all fun and games with Strollonso and all, but I’ve somehow started to actually get attached. He makes me happy, or in this case sad, because the race sucked for him. Not a good weekend for AM. Also Fernando with Alex' shoes. Loved it.

Max. I feel bad for him. I am happy that the Red Bull reign is over (for now) but he deserves a good car, because he’s just such a good driver. Also he really impressed me in grill the grid.

George. I shouldn’t be mad at him for being good, but I am. But at the same time I’m happy for him. He’s a great driver and damn what a race today, he really should have stood on that podium. But he ruined a Ferrari front row by being good so I am allowed to be mad.

Esteban. First of all, happy birthday my man. The race sucked again, but at least this time there was some coverage of him and we didn’t have to assume that he got abducted by aliens. And again, I love his accent way too much.

Liam. I had the time of my life watching his quail. I might have celebrated a little too much when he kicked Max out, but oh well. And he got his first points, which is great for him. I hope he gets a permanent seat soon.

Daniel. I had to include him just so I can mention Taylor Swift. My man singing Our Song was the best thing ever.

[hood-ex]

Congrats on finishing! I enjoyed reading your thoughts, and agree with a bunch of the points made.

I wish Lance and Hunk had gotten more screen time that actually let us watch them grow more, and I personally wish they’d given us more bonding between Coran and Lance, I thought the scenes we got with them was very sweet, and not utilized enough, imo.

I wish they had left out the game show episode, ngl it rubbed me the wrong way watching it the first time, and every time I think about it. It was just so 🤥🫠

I also agree that we didn’t really get to see Shiro have any actual flaws, and really bummed we only got a few minutes of his trauma before moving on.

The Balmerans were so cool to see when they came in, and I adore Hunk and Shay

Same! Throughout the majority of the series, I kept wondering if Lance even had a family because they were never mentioned (unless I'm forgetting some info from very early on in Season 1). Turns out, he had a huge family. He did say he missed them in Season 2 maybe? But we didn't really get to know anything about his life prior to being a paladin/in the Galaxy Garrison. He also didn't really seem to have any special interests or hobbies. Think we only really saw him practicing his weaponry/fighting skills once Keith left (or maybe during the time when Keith took leadership the first time).

We did get to know more about Hunk's family in the later seasons. Again, would've been nice to hear about his close connection to his family earlier on.

Yes! Coran and Lance had some fun interactions! They definitely could've had more personalized moments between the Voltron crew. We got more of that in the earlier seasons, I believe. Like with Shiro and Pidge. Lance and Keith. Those types of combos are fun. I did like that Hunk and Pidge got closer in later seasons. It also felt like they set Lance and Hunk to be besties in the first few episodes of the show, but then they just kinda had the same amount of interactions as everyone else. Might have been nice for them to have more moments together like Shiro and Keith did.

BIG AGREE. I hated the game show episode. I zoned out through most of it. I was just like this is such a waste of episode time.

Yeah! In fact, they could've leaned into the perfectionist aspect and had that weigh heavy on Shiro. Or they could've given him more micro-managing tendencies with him trying to tell the others what to do too much. That would've opened up some interpersonal conflict for Shiro to work through. I also would've been fine if he had lost his shit more often because that was extremely entertaining 😌.

Shay was so sweet 🖤.